I remember when I was so desperately trying to have children and we finally were chosen by birth parents to get my daughter, the words the social worker said to me ” Children are a gift from God but for only a short time, they grow and then we have to let them go.” As I sat at my daughter’s high school graduation last week, the tears streaming down my face in happiness. I saw this little 5lb girl grow up, handle all the adversities God put in her way, and now she was in this beautiful white graduation gown holding a red rose and walking down to end the years in this school system. I was so proud, that for a moment it wiped away all the heartache of her disability. For this time she was just like every other child that was graduating high school. She had a smile, and was so relieved to end, what has been, the most difficult years of her life. On this special day my daughter had quite a lot happen. She went to her senior breakfast, had a quick rehearsal for graduation, received a call that she got a job as a camp counselor in a local camp and had to submit all her paperwork and on the way home got a flat tire. Before she got dressed, I was painting her toes and she broke down. “Mom I’m scared, do you think I can handle being a camp counselor, do you think I am going to do okay at college? Do you think everyone will accept me?” Wow, so much for one small girl to handle in one day. I looked at her very calmly and said “Calm down, take two deep breaths!” First I told her, you are going to do your best at working as a counselor and if it doesn’t work out, you quit. Second, college is your new beginning, fresh, you will be with kids that have the same disability as yourself, and third be yourself, you are a great young lady, be the girl you really are! The tears disappeared I gave her one of her pills to calm her down and told her to take a nap before graduation. The child that emerged was this confident girl that ended the 12 years of school. It goes fast, too fast. There are times when issues with the teachers, learning, aides and seeing the school’s telephone number on my caller id would just turn my stomach. What happens now. Now a new chapter emerges, going away to school, making decisions on her own. My husband and I are trying to be real, yes, we expect some trauma, and hearing from the new school. My daughter’s disability encompasses difficulty in transition, so we are preparing ourselves, we could be pleasantly surprised but I doubt it. I’m being realistic. Two days later we had my daughters graduation party. As a child with NVLD and ADD my daughter does not have a wide scope of friends. Most of them have the same or similar disabilities. I was so pleased when 5 of her friends came to her party. She was so proud and introduced each one to everyone. She had a great time, but the one thing that was so impactful to me was this. One young lady came to her party, she was so happy that my daughter invited her to this party. She said “You know no one ever invites me to their parties because I have ADHD, and I am having such a good time!, Your daughter has been a really good friend to me!”. This was so important to me because this is how my daughter was, no one invited her anywhere because she didn’t fit in, but she overcame this stigma and made friends with children like herself. She found the people who were worth being friends with and turned it around. If she can keep this philosophy throughout college and life, I truly believe she can have a good life. Understanding, the disability, knowing it’s going to be with you for the rest of your life and working with it are the keys for these children. I’ve always stressed to my children, everyone else is different, you are special and never forget it! God made you this way to learn, you have a special purpose in life, the hard part is to find what it is. As parents we are the ones who have to guide them to this purpose. It’s tough, we live it every day, sometimes we cry and other days you say, they did it, they actually did it. Until next time!